I do have to say something though, hoping that whomever reads this takes note and thinks before they say or do this. It isn't fair and is very sad when it happens. It has happened to my dad and now to Kevin, too.
A friend of ours wife came to see Kevin a week ago or so and made the comment that she was upset with her husband because he didn't tell her how bad Kevin was. Okay, that's understandable. But, what she said next is not. She said she wished she hadn't seen him because she wanted to remember him when he was well.
Excuse me! Your memory suddenly goes defunct all of a sudden because you see someone ill? What this women in essence really is saying is that it hurts HER too much to see Kevin sick. I don't really care about HER feelings. By staying away from friends that are sick because YOU don't want to feel bad has got to be the most selfish, self serving thing I have ever heard or seen. Isn't part of being a friend to be there even during the tough times? I have heard the phrase :"fair weather friends" and it seems that many of Kevin's friends, and mine too, were or are that.
Well people, the storms are raging so go home and cocoon in your little bubble of comfort. We, on the other hand are facing the thunder and lightning and yes...raging back!
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Terry, I am so deeply sorry to hear about Kevin!!! I haven't been on your blog in a long time. In reading about this "friend", it reminds me of long, long ago when I lost two babies, two years in a row that were full term. People avoided me. They were very uncomfortable around me and I felt even more alone because of their discomfort. People are odd when it is uncomfortable for them as in your "friend's" case. She was being selfish and she didn't probably realize how she was hurting you by it. I am so sorry. If I can do anything, please let me know.
ReplyDeleteTerry, I am sorry I did not keep up reading your Blog till today. I did miss your July posts. I agree wholeheartedly with your comment not caring about "HER feelings". Some people are just that shallow that no matter what is happening, it is all about them.
ReplyDeleteSad life, to be honest, for them.
If I did not want to see the bad times, that may change my view on how I 'remember them', well, you nailed it, I would have to stay in my cocoon.
I want to help others, and if it gives me a new perspective, so be it! The more new perspectives that I get, the more I want to help others